Fire up your romance: Send love

By Michael R. Malone [email protected] 09-26-2025

That heart emoji pasted to your Instagram photo made your heart pitter-patter just a bit, right? And those likes on your post brought such a smile to your face.

Now imagine what it would be like to receive a letter from someone-a letter? Yes, a written or typed letter, one where that special someone had taken the time to explore their emotions and then express their heart-felt appreciation of how much you mean to them. Now wouldn't that cause your heart to flutter!

"Writing a heartfelt love note is all about putting yourself in the right frame of mind and, for me, that means being in a place of comfort with minimal distractions," said Kimberly Reyes, an assistant professor in the University of Miami College of Arts and Sciences' Creative Writing Program.

"As a double Earth sign, I feel most grounded outdoors by water, and living in Miami Beach makes it easy for me to set up by the coastline, find some shade, put my feet up, and either put on my headphones or just listen to the ocean," added Reyes, a poet, essayist, pop culture critic, and visual culture scholar. "Once I'm sufficiently chilled, I try to think of anything but obvious love metaphors to express how I'm feeling. As a poet, I believe most every poem is a love poem and that most letters people take the time to write are acts of love-so the less obvious and predictable the occasion for writing, the better."

The Romans and Greeks cultivated the art of writing love letters. The practice persisted up to the Victorian Era and flourished especially in times of war, when writing love letters was the only significant exchange and channel of communication between estranged lovers.

Cristina Favretto, head of Special Collections at UM Libraries, discussed the ancient penchant for love letter writing and highlighted libraries' collection of books from the Victorian Era, guides for proper letter writing, and artifacts associated with love letters.

"Roman men and upper-class women (who were often educated) were well-versed in the art of letter writing," Favretto explained. "The Romans had very specific and precise rules for their prose; they didn't use punctuation and relied on the rhythm of the words to convey meaning. Words were chosen very carefully for their sound and the image that sound conveyed. Some of the writings were very erotic-such as the poems of Greek poet Sappho-and others very chaste."

Favretto noted that love in the Victorian Era was especially nuanced.

"It was a popular subject often conveyed with the language of flowers-a yellow rose could mean one thing and a lily could mean another. Women also used their fans to convey messages, and there are some beautiful illustrated guidebooks to teach both the hidden love language of flowers and fans. For example, if a woman drew her closed fan across her cheek, it meant 'I love you,' while touching her left ear with the fan meant 'I want to get rid of you.'

"And there was a whole language of love that was unspoken," Favretto added. "With love letters, you didn't have to be in front of the person, which could be intimidating-a love letter gave you a little distance," she said.

She also highlighted some of the libraries' holdings of letters from the Civil War.

"Soldiers were writing home thinking, 'I might not be here tomorrow.' The letters are so beautiful and meaningful."

Favretto recognized that the notion of letter writing might be a stretch for younger students who may never have written or received a letter. She mentioned a colleague at another university who began a weekly letter writing session for students that became popular.

"There's growing popularity. More and more there's a tendency with Gen Z students to actually enjoy receiving something in the mail with a stamp," Favretto said. "So, my prediction is that love letters are not far behind and that you're actually going to (see a resurgence)."

Samples from Special Collections:

"Lover's Letter Writer" published by William Nicholson & Sons, Wakefield England

Mr. Roberts to Miss Wightman Letter V

Dear Matilda:

I was glad to receive your answers. It was like pure cool water to a thirsty man in the burning desert. It is impossible to tell the joy I felt when I read your acceptance of my attention to you. My heart dilated with rapture; for I am now engaged to the most lovely being in creation, and I am happier than a monarch. Believe me that it shall ever be my study to promote your happiness, and I hope that our joys will be mutual. I will see you immediately and perhaps the best place will be the gate that leads to the beautiful walk skirting the wood a little behind your father's house. Dearest, I will meet you there on Monday next, at two in the afternoon. I shall anticipate the meeting with the greatest ecstasy. Do not fail. From your abiding and faithful lover. Theophilus Roberts.

Lewis Carroll, author of "Alice in Wonderland," in his tiny book "The Wonderland Postage-Stamp Case" offers a few rules for letter writing:

"The best subject to begin with is your friend's last letter. Write with the letter open before you and answer his questions and make any remarks his letter suggests. Then go on to what you want to say yourself. This arrangement is more courteous and pleasanter for your reader then to fill in the letter with your own invaluable remarks, and then hastily answer your friend's questions in a postscript. Your friend is much more likely to enjoy your wit after his own anxiety for information has been satisfied."

"Here is the golden rule to begin with: Write legibly.
Second rule: Don't fill more than a page and a half with apologies for not writing sooner. Best subject to begin with (your friend's last letter).
Then a few other rules: Don't repeat yourself. If you have written a letter that may irritate, however necessary you may have felt to express yourself, put it aside until the next day. Fifth rule is if your friend makes a severe remark. Either leave it unnoticed or make your reply distinctly less severe."

To honor and/or celebrate a University workmate with a written message: visit the University of Miami Recognition Portal.